Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Adoptive Love

In reviewing Jennifer Grant’s book, Love You More, I was reminded of the decision my wife and I made forty-one years ago.  In 1970, there were virtually no cross-cultural adoptions, whereas they are fairly commonplace now.  For us it was adopting a bi-racial girl following the decade of racial unrest in this country.  Our experience was different from the Grants because we adopted first, then had three daughters born to us.  So the younger girls always had a big sister and they grew up without considering that she was different.

Jennifer is transparent in her feelings as she moved through the process of deciding to adopt, and then going through the agonizing wait.  Our experience was very different because we never applied for adoption.  We were simply presented with an opportunity by a county case worker, and we made the decision the next day, and a week later we became parents.

The yuppie lifestyle that the Grants lived before their adoption experience stood in stark contrast to life little Mia lived in Guatemala.  Their experience confirms what most parents realize that children are very resilient in adapting to loving homes.  We have had many friends adopting from other countries such as Guatemala, China, and Eastern Europe.  Recently my nephew and his wife adopted a little boy from the Congo.  Their experience paralleled the Grants.  I affirm that there is a “divine surprise of adopting my daughter.”  Forty one years after the fact, my wife and I would do it again—without hesitation.

1 comment:

  1. Your family's story is beautiful, thanks for sharing it. I loved this book as well. I think it's a great resource for anyone contemplating becoming a parent, whether via adoption or birth. The author has great insights on what it means to be intentional about family culture, but shares them with humor and humility--she's quick to admit she hasn't got it all figured out, but also to share the important questions she's pondering. A well-told, beautifully-written story of what it really means to be a family.